Some Children Pull Hair – Even Those Who Are Not Distressed!
Dear Parent
We are so sorry to hear that a child in your circle is hair pulling or has another body focused repetitive behaviour (BFRB).
You are not alone with this problem and our hearts 💕 go out to you. This page is for YOU. We have a separate page for children.
Firstly, and most importantly, we cannot emphasise enough how important it is for YOU to get some support. You can call our helpline on 07910 114739, although it is more effective to reach out by email or use our contact form. We are entirely volunteer run, so the phone isn’t manned as much as we would like and we cannot return calls. We are, however, here for the whole family for life.
⭐️Secondly, we beg you to please take a few moments to watch our video for parents, as we have packed it full of all the advice we have to offer.
Support is here for you to help your child have the best life possible, with or without a BFRB such as Trichotillomania. All of our volunteers have the condition themselves and have stopped hair pulling or skin picking, so they can give you the perspective of adults having been where your child is now.
You have a journey of acceptance ahead of you, and we’ll help you express your own emotions while supporting your child. Many of our links go to coaching.care, who are partnered with and trained by us, to help you. In return, they donate their fees to maintain our free services.
If your child is very young (under 7 years old), the following download will be very helpful.
Support for Parents of Children with BFRBs
Body-Focused Repetitive Behaviors (BFRBs) such as trichotillomania (hair pulling), nail biting, tooth grinding and skin picking can present difficulty for both children and their parents. Trichotillomania Support have partnered with coaching.care to offer understanding, support and wonderful resources to help you manage your child’s BFRB to the best ability.Understanding BFRBs
BFRBs are compulsive behaviours, resulting in repeated pulling, picking or biting. These conditions are classed as chronic, which means they can recur throughout lifetime, and even if your child stops the behaviour, it is worth staying vigilant and regarding them as in recovery. Body-focused behaviours are often described as methods of coping with stress or anxiety, but honestly, most of the children we treat display no signs of anxiety other than their BFRB. In fact this is most often triggered boredom. Sometimes there is a fear of what other people think.Signs and Symptoms
Common signs of BFRBs in children include noticeable hair loss, damaged fingers or fingernails, or persistent skin bleeding spots. Your child might spend some time zoned-out with these behaviours. There is often a noticeable embarrassment and some lying to try to hide the fact they did this to themselves.How to Help Your Child
1. Open Communication
Talk to your child about their behavior without judgment. Let them know you are there to support them and that it’s okay to talk about their struggles.Be understanding of the duality of the condition
Let them know you realise it wasn’t them who did this, but the condition they have.2. Professional Support
Reach out to a coach who specialises in BFRBs.3. Create a Safe and Supportive Environment
Children with BFRBs are often faced with people making unkind comments. It is your job to offer a safe and encouraging space for them to come home to. Let the child know that you love them with or without hair. Keep your own hands busy when you rest and encourage them to help you clean spoons or something small, to keep their hands busy and win rewards. Play with fidget toys yourself, and engage in hobbies they enjoy.4. Positive Reinforcement
Praise your child for their efforts to stop picking, pulling or biting. Small progress is still progress and even progress later ruined needs rewards. Positive reinforcement is the most successful solution for childhood hair pulling and BFRBs.Resources for Parents
Explore the following resources for more information and support:- Childhood BFRB Treatment Options –
- BFRB.org – Information, support, and resources for individuals with BFRBs and their families.
Online Coaching and Support
If you feel you need more personalized support, consider online coaching designed to help your child understand and manage BFRBs. Our expert coaches can provide specific strategies and the warmest of emotional support for both you and your child.
A freebie for you
Thanks for reading this whole page. This is for YOU, because we know you’re tired and juggling many obligations. Look after yourself first, because your children need you alive and vibrant. Have a freebie, on us! Our brief Energy Power Up mp3.
