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For people who have never experienced trichotillomania, one aspect of hair pulling can be particularly difficult to understand: sometimes pulling a hair feels good, but that doesn't make it entirely intentional.
Hair pulling can feel satisfying, soothing or intensely pleasurable, while also being associated with remorse and dismay. In this discussion, people with the hair pulling condition address the sense that one particular hair needs to be pulled, while hundreds of apparently identical hairs have no appeal at all.
So why does hair pulling feel so good? And why might one person experience an irresistible urge to pull a particular hair when another person cannot imagine wanting to pull out their own hair?
In this short discussion, people with lived experience of trichotillomania talk about the positive as well as the negative aspects of hair pulling. We explore sensory experiences, individual hairs that somehow feel different, and some of the possible processes occurring in the brain.
The Effect of Hair Pulling Can Be Harsh But Often Hair Pulling Feels Good
It is easy to assume that because the consequences of trichotillomania can be distressing, the act of pulling must also be unpleasant.
For many people, that simply isn't the case.
A person can desperately want to stop losing their hair while hair pulling itself feels comforting and rewarding. Recognising the positive aspects of pulling can be important when we are trying to understand why the behaviour is so difficult to change.
This is also why telling somebody to simply stop pulling backfires so profoundly.
Why That Particular Hair?
Many people with trichotillomania will recognise the experience of searching for a particular hair.
The culprit often feels coarser, denser or different. Sometimes the person can describe exactly what they are looking for. At other times, they simply know when they have found the "right hair".
That raises an intriguing question. If thousands of hairs are present, why does the brain assign significance to one in particular?
Sensory processing, attention, anticipation and reward may all have a part to play. We are still learning about the mechanisms involved, and it is important not to present possible explanations as settled science. What we do know is that the sensory experience reported by people with trichotillomania is real and deserves to be understood rather than dismissed.
As With Everything, There Are Positives & Negatives
And yes, that's true of hair roots too. Listen to the discussion to find out how.
Talking about pleasure in hair pulling does not minimise its consequences.
Trichotillomania can cause hair loss, skin damage, shame, frustration and considerable distress. At the same time, pulling may provide pleasure, relief, stimulation, comfort or a satisfying sensory experience.Understanding both sides gives us a much more useful picture of the behaviour.
Instead of asking only How do I stop hair pulling? we can also become curious about What is it about this particular hair that draws me in? That question can give us a deeper understanding of a complex condition.
Understanding Without Dismissing or Judging
There is nothing useful about pretending that every aspect of hair pulling feels terrible.
If pulling feels good to you, you are allowed to say so.
Understanding the rewarding and sensory elements of trichotillomania doesn't mean accepting unwanted consequences. It means beginning with an accurate description of what is actually happening.
Understanding and, crucially ANTICIPATING, enables us to make changes.
About This Discussion
This recording gives us a unique insight into the experiences of real people affected by trichotillomania. We listen in on a coaching session from a community where they feel safe to speak openly.
Some contributors asked us to protect their identities, so where requested, their own words have been reproduced using AI-generated voices.
Trichotillomania Support provides information, support and recovery tools for people affected by hair pulling and other body-focused repetitive behaviours (body-focused repetitive behaviors/BFRBs)